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Forum - Let's talk about Ancient Astronauts

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Edward L WinstonPosted: Jun 24, 2010 - 23:11
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Muertos had a thread on UFOs:

http://conspiracyscience.com/forums/topic/lets-talk-about-ufos So I thought why not talk about Ancient Astronauts? It's definitely a topic that should be covered on this site, as it's been rising in popular for a long time. One thing I noticed is how many of them blatantly lie, they're much like the pseudo-scholars we've seen in recent years promoting inaccurate comparative religion.

In particular there is one guy that really stands out. His name is Giorgio A. Tsoukalos and he is like Peter Joseph and Michael Tsarion combined, but with Jeff Rense's sense of hair style. Every episode of "Ancient Aliens" on the US TV channel "History Channel" his hair gets crazier and crazier, looking more and more like Bozo the Clown's.

One thing he said once really struck me. He was talking about how the Ancient Egyptians must have had light bulbs. He claimed that he and his friends were investigating the King's chamber in Egypt and in order to test whether or not torches would have worked, he tried to spark his lighter. The lighter didn't work because, according to him, there wasn't enough oxygen. This proves, of course, that torches couldn't have been used, and it must have been some kind of electrical light of sorts. What he failed to explain was, how if there wasn't enough oxygen for his lighter, how he and his friends managed to keep from suffocating.

There are plenty of other people to talk about as well. In this thread I'd like to discuss both them and their theories, perhaps we can build a general topic article from it.

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Sil the ShillPosted: Jun 24, 2010 - 23:22
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Where's a good place to start for information on these theories? I assume the premise is that aliens visited ancient civilizations or something like that?

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Edward L WinstonPosted: Jun 24, 2010 - 23:26
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We could start with each claim we can find, such as the lighter thing. Nazca Lines, Stone Henge, pyramids, etc.

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Kaiser FalknerPosted: Jun 24, 2010 - 23:54
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So, these aliens came down and decided to help us give technology and or help us build our civilizations and all we got were some stone structures? I want my hover cars and free energy goddamnit!

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NanosPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 00:13
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I can quite imagine we got our hover cars and free energy devices, but then when they broke, being the savages we are, we threw them into a landfill site and forgot about them..

I see the same thing happening today with modern tech that few people can fix even the most simplist of problems. (My fav is the on/off switch breaking on things, and they throw it out!)

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NanosPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 00:18
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When looking back at ancient technology, it would't suprise me if someone back then had got as far as building aircraft/spacecraft, going on examples of this surviving example which appears rather forward for its time:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Antikythera_mechanism</p>

I also find historical documentation of events interesting as possible clues to advanced tech, made I reckon more believable by nowdays listening to folk explain things to each other when their technological knowledge is limited!

I had the devil of a job trying to explain to a neighbour that my solar powered vehicle will run off sunlight and not require gas/petrol to make it work, to him it was just magic!

Or another time, when I lived in the countryside, someone seriously asking me if the space shuttle launches was just all special effects, we really didn't do that did we!

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anticultistPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 04:28
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eric von daniken is the father of this stuff.

i read a few of his books, i have one or two lying about here somewhere

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Kaiser FalknerPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 09:13
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"I can quite imagine we got our hover cars and free energy devices, but then when they broke, being the savages we are, we threw them into a landfill site and forgot about them"

Personally I don't think humans were ever gifted anything from ETs, but I do like the image of a person, way back when, having a break down, getting upset, and then throwing their Hovercar in a landfill named atlantis.

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oreolvrsPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 09:37
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Its highly possible that aliens do know about Earth and possibly even the human race after all the could have evolved on their home planet millions possibly billions of years ago.Our planet whent through five(going on six) mass extinction events before we evolved and they possibly didnt have 1000 years of scientific development stunted by religion(or something similar) and probably developed an RBE more quickly than us.As for abductions etc. I dont believe that has happened since all they need to do is read medical textbooks without any anal probing or other experiments that abductees and CT'rs like to harp on about.

Edit:Like Carl Sagan I find UFO's and the pseudoscience involved quite interesting compared to other forms of conspiracy theories due to the whole questions that it raises ie are we alone etc -
some food for thought : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nroo-i8t8vg /> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YL4cFjmnQT8&feature=related

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NanosPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 09:49
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I don't imagine ET if they existed, ever gifted us anything, I can imagine it cost us asmall fortune to buy!

I often have this vision that ET is probably more like a bunch of double glazing salesmen than anything else, and the reason they don't visit us much is simply because we are too poor to afford to buy even their cheapest 2nd hand intergalactic spaceship yet..

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Kaiser FalknerPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 09:52
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Alien 1: Hey, lets road trip!
Alien 2: Where to?
Alien 1: Oh, I don't know. Let's go to Earth. I wonder what its like!
Alien 2: OH NO! Fuck no! That's the East St. Louis of space. I don't want to breathe their air, its too poor and filthy.

Disclaimer: I don't think East St. Louis is too poor or dirty- I think its too scary.

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sorryPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 09:58
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Edward will ban you for that.

#12 [ Top | Reply to Topic ]
Edward L WinstonPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 10:18
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East St. Louis? Hell, I don't even go there, ever.

>> i read a few of his books, i have one or two lying about here somewhere

The keyword being "lying"

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anticultistPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 10:27
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The keyword being "lying"

hehe yup.

http://www.evdaniken.com/</p>

For anyone interested in this info

#14 [ Top | Reply to Topic ]
Edward L WinstonPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 10:32
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President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho: porn star and five-time ultimate smackdown wrestling champion!

Level: 150
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I read Chariots of the Gods a very long time ago and the leaps of faith were just too much for me to take seriously.

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anticultistPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 10:35
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Yeah "here is an image of an inca man carved into a stone tablet, but it looks like a man sitting in a rocket powered chair facing upwards towards the sky !! ...further evidence the kings of this society were visited by extra terrestrial intelligence !!!"

truly stooooooopid stuff.

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oreolvrsPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 10:46
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I only got interesteded in the Ancient Aliens Documentary on the History Channel because I was considering writing a scinece FICTION novel/video game plot that went around the same vein.However Giorgio A. Tsoukalos was way too "out there" for me(and im not just talking about his hair and fake tan).I mean he utilises the same sort of distorted logic as Acharya's Sun=Son as in every religion has sky gods therefore they were really space aliens!!! talk about being totally fracked up I ended up laughing through the entire thing.

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MuertosPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 12:22
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I think the "ancient astronauts" theory is preposterous, and Von Daniken is one of the worst of the New Age charlatans. I know there are many comprehensive debunkings of Chariots of the Gods, does anyone have a link to one?

Anyone who has studied ancient history (or even more recent history, such as medieval history) would know that ancient astronaut theories are ridiculous. They rest upon the arrogant and often racist premise that "there's no way primitive peoples could have built X or Y without modern tools, so they must have had help from aliens." This premise offends me. Not only were ancient peoples extremely clever and talented builders, mathematicians and engineers, but many feats of engineering in the ancient and medieval worlds are far superior to anything we can build today.

Case in point: Hagia Sofia in Constantinople is probably the sturdiest and most earthquake proof building in the world. It's survived countless catastrophic quakes, and although the dome collapses every few hundred years, the structure of the building itself could literally survive a direct hit with a nuclear weapon. In fact modern engineers study Hagia Sofia to learn about how to build better earthquake-proof buildings. Hagia Sofia was built in 537 A.D. and we have extensive historical documentation for its construction--and there were no flying saucers in Byzantium.

If Hagia Sofia could be built 1500 years ago much better than we could construct it today with all our modern technology, why is it such a stretch that the Egyptians, some of the smartest people who ever lived on this earth in any time, could build a pyramid, or the Mayans, or whatever? I guarantee that 5000 years from now the Great Pyramid will still be standing, and the Empire State Building won't be.

Ancient astronaut theories bother me. A lot.

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Edward L WinstonPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 12:25
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President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho: porn star and five-time ultimate smackdown wrestling champion!

Level: 150
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I agree Muertos, I've always thought that ancient astronauts theories are just a way to easily explain away difficult questions. There are some mysteries as to how ancient people built or did things, but that just means we haven't figured it out yet, it doesn't mean it was impossible for them to do so.

I also find it offensive as a human being, as if we weren't clever enough or innovative enough to figure out how to move a 20 ton stone with no wheels.

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sorryPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 12:28
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I was just talking to a girl who is interested in how extraterrestrials may have had a part Egyptian technology. Where do I find these females?

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MuertosPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 12:35
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Aaron, tell her that you're a student of sexual techniques taught to the ancient Egyptians by super-beings from Zeta Reticuli. She'll probably be curious enough to let you bone her.

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Edward L WinstonPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 12:51
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President Dwayne Elizondo Mountain Dew Herbert Camacho: porn star and five-time ultimate smackdown wrestling champion!

Level: 150
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I second that repeated motion.

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EdPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 13:39
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I agree and also say you think they may have communicated sexually, say you had one appear to you in a dream and told you how it could be done and if you could practise the method on her, for scientific purposes of course.

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JoePosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 15:15
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I like it when he was talking about the underground city in Turkey. He seid that the only reason that they would that was to keep form being bombed by alians. And I was crazy enouth to think that it was becouse of the lack of trees in the desart.

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sorryPosted: Jun 25, 2010 - 15:19
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@ Muertos: lol, judging from what else I've learned about her, that might work.

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